Losing The Clothing Wars (But Winning In The End)

BACK TO BASICS | by KAVITA VARMA-WHITE

MY KIDS SPENT THEIR EARLY YEARS attending a Catholic school in Florida. They had to wear uniforms, and the only real choice each day was whether to wear a yellow, white or blue shirt.

Two years ago we moved to the Pacific Northwest and joined a public elementary school. That first day in September was a treat. My then 9-year-old was beyond excited that she had traded in her plaid uniform and sensible black school shoes for cool shorts, a hoody and a pair of slip-on sneakers. My son, who was 6, put on a football jersey and shorts. The weather was warm and everyone was giddy at the freedom of wearing whatever they wanted.

A few weeks later when the temperature dropped, I insisted both of them wear long pants and jackets. The fight that ensued was no fun. (“No one wears long pants. Why do we need a jacket? ” [Insert name of friend] never wears a coat!” The fight the day after that was no fun, either. This went on for a few days and each time, I’d “win” the clothing battle, but they left the house sulking, which is never a good way to start a school day.

That’s when I realized it wasn’t worth it. Good grades are a must. Good behavior in school is a must. Dressing warmly because I thought it was a cold day? Not a must.

We compromised by agreeing to just one rule: If it’s below 40 degrees, long pants have to be worn. Every day they check the weather. If it’s forecasted to be a low of 38 and a high of 42, they argue that shorts are technically still allowed, and they walk out the door dressed as if they are still in balmy Florida.